My venting and my rambling … FUCK YOU AND YOUR GODDAMN INSECURITIES. I’m so over your bipolar bullshit. Stop trying to purposely fuck good things up in your life. Stop trying to push people away and find excuses to kick them out of your life. You believe them over me. Obviously you really aren’t a friend or even an ex or even taken the least bit consideration in the fact that I have opened up to you, my heart, my body, my mind …you know my secrets, my fears, my insecurities, my mistakes …and you constantly remind me of them day after day. I’m not perfect. I am human. But I damn sure as well did love you. Did, key word, idk if it is or can even still be do. You broke my heart. Finally the one guy I open up to and you break my trust…my little glimmer of hope that I had :( you fucking shattered me. I hate you for that. I hate how your words can make everything ok. I hate how you have that control over me. You really thing Id hookup with someone you hate ? Really think I’d marr my chances at every getting you again? Well your an idiot if you do. You were my world. Now it’s shattered. I’m broken. Tired. Emotionally and mentally. Like do you not understand I’m a human???! I’m a human being with fears and needs and desires and heart ache just like everyone else on this fucking planet. Yet you play games. You treat me like Im just a game piece, I’m never in the game. Your always the winner. Haven’t I proved to you enough that I’m a decent person? That I can love you and care for you more than anyone can? Haven’t I ? Time and time again!!! I sacrificed my sleep and my hw and my sanity to help you. But yet I get taken advantage of, taken for granted. I remember the old me and I’m nothing like her anymore, you broke me. Congrats asshole. Didn’t think I would get another in my life but you just took that opportunity and stepped right up didn’t you? Had to get involved in my life and my heart and then suck it right out of me. Your a piece of shit and I hate you and I love you all at the god damn same time. I can’t stand it. I need to escape. I need to get away. Delete you out of my life. Make you just vanish :( poof! But it’s not that easy :/ I’m starting my new life…and to whether or not you deserve to be In it …well that’s up to me. Why don’t you fucking prove yourself to me like I’ve done to you? Huh? Are you scared ? Ya? Well maybe that’s what a relationship is! Sacrificing and facing your fears! Forgetting your issues, forgetting your past and looking ahead as to what can come. This is the last straw. I can’t take it anymore. You turn on me like a rabbid dog. Fuck you. I don’t need you or this drama or pain or bullshit in my life. I’m done.